I Don’t Need Therapy Premium Oversized Unisex T-Shirt – Melancholy Clubwear for the Emotionally Literate

You don’t need to be fixed. You need guestlist, strobes, beats — and to be lightly seduced by someone who’s emotionally unavailable but curates a mean sunrise set.

This shirt is for those of us still haunted by the ghosts of 2014 Sisyphos dancefloors.
For the ones who left the club… but the club never really left them.

Now you get your serotonin in microdoses:
An hour alone in the kitchen.
A functioning espresso machine.
That one friend who still DJs and sends you pre-release links like it’s 2012.
You’re not healed — you’re just well-styled and deeply tired.

Details to match your disillusionment:

• 100% heavyweight cotton – dense like your emotional repression
• 240 GSM – hangs with intention, not desperation
• Drop shoulders – because you’ve been carrying enough already
• Soft brushed texture – gentler than your child’s hands on your hungover forehead
• Printed in Germany – trauma-informed ink
• Made in Turkey – not fast fashion, just emotionally slow-processed
• Front: "I don’t need therapy..." – highlighted like a cry for help
• Back: Blank, like your calendar and soul

For Women — Fit Guide (from ironic to existential):

• XS (54cm) – fitted like a denial spiral
• S (57cm) – just oversized enough to say “don’t text me”
• M (60cm) – the ex’s t-shirt you never gave back energy
• L+ – wear it with leggings and don’t explain yourself

Care Instructions:

Wash inside out, line dry, don’t text your ex.

Bon & Xilo Apprl – For the Formerly Vibrant.
Because even your emotional baggage deserves beautiful packaging.